Marriage D'amour

I don't know what this song should be about. From its title "marriage d'amour", I guess it is about marriage. Perhaps a wedding.

I always knew the song by its Mandarin name on the score I used to learn this song - 《梦中的婚礼》literally "Wedding in Dream".

Since the wedding is in a dream, presumably it was not real. Is the wedding the kind the pianist/composer has longed for, or the kind the pianist dreads? Is it a happy song or a sad song?

I've thought that it is a sad, more precisely melancholic song. The wedding is something beautiful, and it is in the pianist's dream, if only the bride** were there. The bride is dead. So the wedding never materialized.

The bridegroom was recovering from grief. So I think this piece should be played with a tinge of grief of bridegroom from reminiscing his lover's and his past. Now that the lover is gone, the beautiful wedding remains a dream.

My current interpretation la.

**note: I used to "feel" the persona as the bride grieving over her fiance's death. Gave up figuring out how the transition of the gender of the persona occurred.

To be honest I suspect it occurred because I accepted my homosexuality. So it's okay to love men as a man. Of course, you can argue it both ways. For example, when I "feel" the bride playing, it could be that I am thinking of a male lover, which is natural of me. On the other hand, if I "feel" the bridegroom, well, I'm a man after all. But how do I explain the change of the gender of the dead lover (from male to female)? I don't know, but I guess my impression of a heterosexual wedding would be stronger than a gay wedding which I have never witnessed before, hence the difficulty in imagining a two men's wedding. Like who's going to wear the white gown, you see.

Now, to what extent do our feelings originate from our "inner self" rather than being the product of our social norms and collective imagination?